Asking people to get tested

[AJRL]

I don't know if anyone else will find this kind of information useful, but it seems like at least someone apart from me will benefit from ideas and suggestions about this.

Since I don't really have any close or useful Y-DNA matches right now, I want to get one of my relatives in Greece to do a Y-DNA test in the meantime. This may not provide much useful information, but I'll at least be able to prove our relation. The one problem is that these are somewhat distant relatives (mostly third cousins) who I've never met in person. None of the relatives I've talked to more than once are potential candidates for testing, so no matter who I decide to ask, it's gonna be someone I'm acquainted with either very little or not at all.

What is the best way to approach asking someone to get tested? Is there a good way to bring it up or to pose the question? Is there anything in particular that you should avoid saying? Also, have you ever had success with this? Or had someone blow up and file a restraining order? I realize there isn't just one right way to do this, but I'm sure there are some dos and don'ts to consider.

[T E Peterman]

1. offer to pay for the test.
2. explain that this doesn't involve medical information.
3. explain that it is painless & easy to do.

The best thing would be to order a kit that will be paid by invoice when the kit is received back by Family Tree DNA. Make sure that you are the primary e-mail contact. They will tell you when the kit has been returned & you can pay then.

Timothy Peterman

[Zaru]

Everything that he said PLUS...

Just be upfront with them. If you will have access to a computer there, show them the project website so they can have a firm sense of the anthropological grounding that this test has. Bring the kit with you (you might be able to use just your surname to order, then fill it in with the first afterward) and bring it back with you or mail it in yourself.

You might want to find someone from a younger generation to submit to the test. In my case in Sicily, the older generation wants to have no part of it, but I have found a potential donor for a younger male to submit. I will purchase the kit and do all of the footwork beyond the obvious.

Good luck.

[EdwardRHill]

It sounds like you have a lot of options if it was me I would exchange information looking for someone thats interested. Hopefully you'll have more than one and tell them what information you have. Get them interested than when your comfortable mention the test and tell them it would help you out if they would test. Answer any question they have and hope some will test. Good luck

[loobster]

If I manage to find a relative who agrees to get tested - I understand I can pay for it (either thru credit-card online, or by having invoice sent to me), and put myself down as primary e-mail -- and either have kit sent to the relative or to me to send on. Is this correct?

If at a later time, after this test processed, I then want to upgrade - for example, if just did lowest level mtDNA and later I want to go Full-Sequence, or I want to add FamilyFinder -- do I just ask for and pay for the upgrade, or do I need to get permission from the Person who sent in the sample?

[cjm95]

If you purchase the kit and test someone else then you can upgrade at anytime. If you have the kit number and password because the acct. belongs to you then you would not have to ask that person. Of course if the person you are testing says they don't want you to test for anything else (which I don't see why) then it would be a personal decision for you. I manage several kits which are all family members and I just order what I want to because I am the only one interested in DNA in my family.

Yes you can have the test sent directly to the person being tested. Just use their address when you order. After they receive the test then you can change the mailing address back to your own at anytime.

[Brunetmj]

I would also suggest making the request in their language if that is an issue.
Even if they speak English using a native language is more respectful .
I would also check the countries laws on this matter also if you haven't already. I know several European countries where it is illegal without a doctors order.

[loobster]

If I pay for a kit, have it sent to a relative - is the release form sent to me/ do I sign the release form, or is it sent to my relative and the relative needs to sign it, or is it a different release form, or ???

[cjm95]

The release form is sent with the kit although if it does not get sent back with the kit there is an option to sign the release on the website.

[Jim Barrett]

The release form should be signed by the person providing the DNA sample because it is their DNA that will be compared to others.